Saturday, August 29, 2009
Group C Connector
Post your connections to the book. These may be connections to: your own life (text to life)To happenings at school or in the neighborhood or in the newspaper (text to world)To other books or stories (text to text)To other writings on the same topic (text to text)To other writings by the same author (text to author)Please respond to each other's entries.
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hi
ReplyDeleteHi group!
ReplyDeletetest blog
ReplyDeleteHi girls,
ReplyDeleteAs I was reading the novel, I thought of any connections I had with the text. The most important one that I noticed was a connection with my own life. In college I had a roommate who was Indian. Reading this text reminded me of the conversations she and I had about her culture. She often told me about her culture and how things were very different from the American culture. Although she understood and respected her culture she often times wished she was more "Americanized". After college she ended up getting married and having an arranged marriage. It was interesting to spend a day with her and observe how different her life was from mine. This was the only text that I read by her so I was unable to make any text to author connections. I was curious though about the authenticity of the novel. I wonder if this was an accurate portrayal of what life was like during this time for these people. Any thoughts??
"Did amma still love the man who used to be my father? Or was it just the dry ash of duty still smoldering in her breast? Did I still love what remained of him?" - page 74
ReplyDeleteI connected with amma and appa's relationship after his accident as it reminds me of relationships I see in my own life. As my grandparents and other family members age, I've noticed a shift in their roles to accomidate health concerns.
I watched my great-aunt, Mary, crumble into a shell of her former self when she developed Alzheimer's. My grandmother (her sister) cared for her daily as she lost her memory and the ability to live independently. I poignantly remember my grandmother saying the sister she knew was gone one afternoon while gingerly brushing her sister's hair. And yet, caring for her was something she had to do. Since then my Aunt Mary has passed and my grandmother has said that she didn't grieve over Mary's passing because she'd spent the last five years slowly saying goodbye and for all intensive purposes Mary was dead long ago.
Today my grandmother cares for my aging grandfather who has suffered from a stroke. Although they've been married for 62 years, they no longer live as husband and wife; rather my grandmother acts as in-home care provider. She's lost much of her independence as a result of having to care for my grandfather 24/7. I, like Vidya, wonder if my grandmother still loves my grandfather in the way she had before his stroke. Does she care for him out of a sense responsibility or because a deeper love?
Hello, I'm not sure if I am posting into the correct group because I missed our first class. So, I hope you all don't mind that I blog with you! I also hope this posts under my name, Sarah, and not my husbands!
ReplyDeleteI agree with you both that there were bits of the text that were hard to connect with because I am not as familiar with the Indian culture. I was also wondering how accurate this portrayl was of the lifestyles.
At the beginning of the book, I saw Vidya as a very independent, self-motivated character that wanted nothing more than to go to school and be free. There could be nothing farther from the person I was at I was at her age. At that point in my life, I was picturing my future married with children. Yet, as I continued reading I realized we had many things in common. Although I saw my future much differently than Vidya, I realized that we both had plans for where we saw our life going and how we pictured our futures, yet both of us had experiences that changed our lives. The family as she knew it was no longer after the protest event. My life had changed after I heard news of my sister’s death in a car accident. My family as I knew it completely changed after my sister was killed in a car accident. On one hand I was mourning my sister whom I’d expected to always be around. On the other hand I was dealing with the fact that my mother also struggling with the loss of her daughter, had completely changed and I wondered if she would ever go back to the happy person she was before. I believe Vidya and I both experienced a feeling of defeat, which lingers knowing that truly we have no control, we can try to plan on things happening in a certain way, but truly it is out of our hands. Stepping back and thinking about it, is quite scary. Yet, often there is no time to sit and linger. We have to pick up the pieces and in many cases grown up a little sooner than we planned. Vidya had to sacrifice many things, as I did to help our families cope. Experiencing an unexpected event such as Vidya’s and my own, I think we hold on tightly trying to control the little pieces in our life, just as Vidya did when she chased down Kitta to speak with him one last time as he headed out for an unknown future. I found myself relating to her experiences, and trenches in the road that we all face. Vidya losing her father and not being able to speak to him, her dreams shattering and life changing as she knew it in a moment. Yet, life moves on and we must move with it just as Vidya was eventually able to conquer her dream of going to college.
I made a connection with Vidya's grief concerning her dad. My dad changed before his death due to some health issues. He was the same in some ways and different in some ways. I treasure the time that we shared in the final years of his life. I liked the way in the novel that Vidya kept thinking about what her father would have said about different things. Even though he wasn't "there" he was with her and that is what I have experienced in the time since my Dad's passing. It gives me strength and comfort, although ,like Vidya, I miss him every day.
ReplyDeleteI was struck by the fact that Vidya and her family were forced to live in a prison -like atmosphere and that was in contrast to the fact that she found freedom in the library. The reading that she did further opened her mind which in turn opened her options. It is a demonstration of the power of her parent's belief in her that she could reach for her dreams and no matter what circumstances she was in she would not give up her dream. That is a theme that is demonstrated constantly in life and literature.
ReplyDeleteHello everyone,
ReplyDeleteKaren I like you wasn't sure of any connections to Climbing the Stairs as I was reading it. Although I really enjoyed the book, it was difficult to think of anything. I then thought of 2 connections. The first is how the women in thatha's house served the men. Being Puerto Rican, I learned at a very early age that whenever my father wanted or needed anything, my mother was the person to get it. My mother has been a homemaker since my oldest sister was born. She took care of everything. My mom did the laundry, cleaned the entire house alone, made dinner, mowed the lawn, you name the chore and she did it! In fact, she still does. My mother expects me to "serve" my husband and is shocked when I don't. My husband loves when my parents come to visit. It's the only time that he doesn't have to lift a finger to do anything around the house. My mother and I take care of everything.
The other thing I connected with was how Vidya felt towards periamma. My mothers older sister, my titi, never seems to have anything good to say about anyone. She feels she is above everyone else in the family. She never fails to remind the family that my cousins, her sons, are engineers and have given her trips around the world. Like periamma, she gossips about everyone and everything behind their backs and she doesn't seem to care who she hurts.
Sarah and Meg how difficult it must be to have experienced such difficult hardships. I don't know if this connects, but my sister in law sent me a cause to join on Facebook about a little girl, Kelsey, who suffered abuse when her mother began dating a man after divorcing Kelsey's father. Kelsey's father was overseas fighting in Iraq when the abuse began. Kelsey was only 2 when she was sent to live with her paternal grandmother, where she was happy and safe. After about a year, Kelsey returned to live with her mother and stepfather and the abuse began again. The video about Kelsey didn't specify exactly what transpired but Kelsey had been kicked in the stomach so hard by her stepfather, it killed her. The pictures that flashed of her father by her grave made me cry. I guess the connection is probably how his life changed so drastically. The guilt he must have felt being so far away and not being able to help his little girl. Much like Vidya feeling guilty about joining the protesters and being the cause of appa's life as an "idiot." At least Vidya had a way for her life and her family's life could get better. The book alludes to the future Vidya will have with Raman who appears to truly care for Vidya and her family regardless of appa's condition. Some families may not always have that happy ending.
ReplyDeleteI completely understand where you are coming from Marilyn. I have been dating a Peruvian guy for four years now and we have moved in together within the past year. The Peruvian culture is very much like the Puerto Rican and Indian cultures in that they expect the women to wait on the man. His mother and grandmother had a real problem with me because I didn’t cook my boyfriend dinner every night and do all the chores. He finally had to sit them down and explain the cultural differences. Because my culture is so different than that, it infuriated me that they expected this of me. Having this experience made me respect Vidya even more. She came from a house where traditional Indian culture was not enforced and then was thrown into a household where she had to obey the men. I know how frustrated and angry it makes me, so for her to be able to endure that made her a stronger character in my mind.
ReplyDeleteHilary,
ReplyDeleteI think in 2009, we are still in a transition time of defining gender roles. Some older people may do what they've always done but younger people today, have to redefine their roles and find what works for them. Even 50 years ago, there wasn't much of a choice. Today's young people have many blessings and much new territory to forge.
Living in the mainstream American culture I think it's easy for me to forget about the inequalities, especially in gender that still exist today all over the world. I have never been told that I couldn't go to college -- in fact I was encouraged from any early age. It's hard for me to wrap my mind around what Vidya struggles through to be her true self.
ReplyDeleteDear everyone,
ReplyDeleteSome of these emails are so moving. I am touched. It is interesting though, to me, that no one speaks to the violence-nonviolence issue. To me, the novel is spurred by 2 questions that I think are universal: (1) When, if ever, a nation (or a person) should ever take up arms and (2) What violence/nonviolence means at a personal level and the role, if any, that "peace" plays in our lives. To me, that is the most important theme in the novel...in fact, I was spurred to write the novel because I was thinking of becoming a US citizen and started wondering how I felt about the Iraq war - and that reminded me of a time when others in my family had asked similar questions about war and thier personal stand on nonviolence. I am always interested to say that on a first read, many Americans don't see that parallel...though often many do pick up on it on a second read...and those who have witnessed the civil rights movement or have had family in WWII certainly make those connections between the novel and this culture.
Thanks so much for all your comments so far, it was wonderful for me to read them.
Padma Venkatraman